“The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you first find yourself.” –Mark Caine

(I will NOT be held captive.)

Do you ever have times where your mind just rambles off into a direction that you never expected? This afternoon was one of those moments, as I watched Postpartum Progress’ video on their climb next weekend. To think about who I was then and who I am now… it is completely surreal.

I remember being absolutely numb at the birth of our sweet boy. I never told a soul, but instead I lived in darkness for quite a while. Almost 5 years later, there are only tiny scars – memories – left as a reminder of where I’ve been. I still wish that I had spoken out – but I thought that the anxiety which consumed me (through both pregnancies) would make others think differently of me. My pride won, for sure. I am a really positive person, and I needed to maintain that image. But two complicated pregnancies, a history of body image and autoimmune challenges, plus one year of a super sick baby crushed my “happiest human” perspective.

(I will NOT be held captive.)

I don’t know when the healing began – but I know that some time around¬†when we decided to move to¬†Arizona – around the same time that I started this business – that I began to notice a greater freedom in my spirit… Maybe it was January, when I claimed this as “The Year of Fearless Health.” (In all honesty, my mind was on the physical side… but emotional and spiritual growth has tagged along. I was just aiming to heal my autoimmune – big enough goal, right??)

I love that God has plans that we don’t even know about yet. I am glad to be in a space to honor this. Finally.

(I will NOT be held captive.)

Anyhow, for those who didn’t know about the above, I was held captive. But, now I am free. And freedom, is MY definition of success. Freedom is my why. It’s why I teach, why I advocate, why I self-care… it’s why I coach and mentor and pray. Because we all need to be free. We all need to find it in ourselves to pause and to truly become alive.

We need to not be captive, to anything. We are made for so much more. I hope you agree.

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